With Your Fondest Dreams…a Double Scotch

I am aware of a young man, not quite on the cusp of manhood…29 months old to be precise… who announced to his mother last week that he wanted to join the ranks of the potty-trained and wear underpants. His mind was made up… no turning back, no basic training needed. I’m ready as rain…now. The civilizing influence of his older friends…32 and 34 months old…was, no doubt, decisive, as well as the prospect of Superheroes covering his rear end.

His mother, enlightened, and thus aware of the rocky road ahead, seized the moment and decamped to the super market to get some rewards for his future achievements. She explained the rules…one M & M for peeing in the potty and two M & Ms for the more robust efforts of…well, who needs more explanation?

He nano-seconded the offer like IBM’s Watson computer and told his mother that he would only be accepting one M & M, leaving to her the sorrowful prospect that he’d be putting off his more robust efforts to a future date. He will, no doubt, suggest to her that merely thinking about those more robust efforts, as he is, should alone qualify him for the second M & M. But so far he has figured out how to maximize rewards for only peeing.

Look out Watson…there’s a gamer in the house.